"Erica Jong was the Helen Fielding of Emily Henrys." I love this. I loved this whole essay in fact. Thank you. Please keep writing because for me, your essays are as vital as strength-training for surviving these next four years.
I loved everything about this essay. I’ve read all the “chick lit” writers mentioned and enjoyed them all. This was the first time I’ve seen anyone ask why the male writers aren’t separated out and categorized for excoriation in the same way. Women buy and read more fiction than men…and somehow that still works against writers of women-centric fiction? Screw the patriarchy! Read what you love. Write what you love. Thank you for writing this.
First thought: I loved watching S&TC even while I thought Carrie and Samantha and Charlotte and even Miranda were shallow. Even at the time I knew it was a guilty pleasure. Second thought: Paul Theroux -- what a putz. And, the most important thought: critics don't put the best books in our hands. IN HER SHOES was your first book that I read, without having heard your name before. I bought at my favorite tiny indie bookstore decades ago. I took it right home, started reading, and couldn't put it down. And as the plain (but smart!) school-newspaper-editor sib with a gorgeous homecoming-princess sister, that book spoke to me on all different levels. I still love it and it holds up through many rereads. The critics and Paul Theroux don't matter to me. (Pudenda? You KNOW this is not a man who likes women.) It does make me sad when younger female critics feel good about taking potshots and think they have some insider knowledge of what's relevant.
Terrific newsletter. Happy to see you here instead of NYT, which I temporarily dropped during their abysmal treatment of Biden.
I want to thank you for always championing women's fiction. That whole "chick lit" labeling thing is almost as annoying as when something is or isn't dubbed "literature". I'm reminded of the Oscar snubs Spielberg endured, because his movies were too popular and accessible. A threat to the effete snobbery.
I'm not your normal demographic; I never see men in the pix from your book signings. I don't know why. Listening to your novels in the car has literally saved my life, keeping me awake and fully engaged during long late-night commutes. So... thanks for that! <3
From “Good in Bed” to “The Breakaway”…you still are one of my favorites. Chick lit or women’s fiction, who cares as long as it entertains, teaches a little something and makes me happy. ♥️
Just wrote a sentence in an essay referring to myself as "longing to be a sophisticated and zipless type of woman" and wondered would anyone in 2025 understand what I was talking about???
Second, I guess I committed the terrible mistake of quitting my job... and on top of that, I'm stubborn as hell and determined to make this work.
It took me 20+ years to reach a nice position and be more or less recognized by my peers (maybe if they had been a little bit more like me or willing to accept all my weirdness, I would have stayed... who knows), to feel empowered enough to be able to say out loud I deserved something bigger and better. So, here I am, one year after. I have no salary, I've spent many hours in front of my laptop, I've invested in my job by paying a professional to edit my manuscript, and if things go as the contract said... I'll be publishing next year. Yeah, me!
LOVE this post. I’ve been a fan of yours since the very beginning, when Good in Bed was just out and hadn’t become the massive hit it became. This post is spot on. I’m so sick of the hate on women’s writing and the constant attempts to trash it. Also, I watched SATC shortly after it ended on hbo and adored it back then and watched it over and over again. Fast forward several years and I’ve recently rewatched it and so much of it is just horrifying. But I still have a soft spot in my heart for the show. Have you been watching And Just Like That? It’s so ridiculous but also entertaining.
(Apologies for the long comment!) Before I read one of your books, I saw the movie version of In Her Shoes and fell in love. I picked up Certain Girls, and bonded immediately with Cannie, who looked like me and made me feel brave. From there, I’ve read my way through your literary journey and have never been disappointed. I prefer women’s fiction over chick lit, but I simply call your books great fiction, and recently recommended The Breakaway to my husband, who I know will thoroughly enjoy it. I’ve been a reader since able, a writer since I was an early teen, a journalist for more than 30 years, and a tragically inspired novelist with no gumption to pursue a full-time gig with it (because I suck—it’s OK, I know it). I’m also enjoying my nonfiction writing here more. (Hold on, I’m getting there…) You conjure up thoughts about how my view on writing has changed since I penned my first short story in the early days. For most of my adulthood, I wanted to quit my job and write novels, and when I was between jobs, I had the time, but the words didn’t come. But now, at 56 (which doesn’t feel nearly as old as I thought my grandma and mom were at this age), I realize that I don’t want to write for a living—I wouldn’t quit my full-job job if you gave me a book deal and seven-figure advance. I just want to write without restrictions or prescriptions, and share that with others. Again, apologies for the length of this comment, but thank you for the few minutes of self-reflection this morning. (Also, I desperately need a character like Cannie who’s menopausal but not feeble and one step from the grave, as this age is depicted in too many books. Please consider. 🙂)
I'm 70, reasonably educated, and a "retired" nurse (I quit my last job in my mid fifties and didn't seek another). I'm of a liberal bent, opinionated, prone to flights of fancy, obsessed with the "why" in life when it comes to human behavior and it's varied consequences, and to suddenly dropping one passion for a brief depression and then picking up another.
I began to write at around six years of age. My parents, and later I myself kept all of my scribblings in a pile well into my child raising years. As was my tendency, in a brief fit of self-disgust, pessimism and a recurring, but rare desire for organization, put them in a folder, stowed them somewhere and haven't seen them since.
This was during the period when I was recently married, my first son was a toddler and my husband and I accepted my recently widowed mother's invitation to join her in a move from inner city Chicago to rural Missouri. There she would buy some land near her aged parents and her siblings, build a house and settle into a life she wistfully remembered from her childhood.
I just read last night your article in slate from 2013 about writing likable characters as recommended in my writing class. Seems like in 2025 not a whole lot has changed in the field of women’s fiction. Keep up the great essays!
I was a teenager in the 2000s and chick lit was crucial to my development and understanding of the world - that there was *insert Disney song* more to life then my suburban immigrant path and here's a template for how to live to the life the women you knew didn't know since communism and immigration. Does that exist nowadays?
Men have bullied women throughout the ages whenever we display a talent they also possess, because how dare we encroach on their territory. Men critiquing the female sexual experience have about the same amount of expertise about the female sexual experience as the men making laws to control women’s bodies 🙄
SATC is now a cultural touchstone. We can look back and see how we have and haven’t evolved as a society & a species since then
As a writer, my own process has been a roller coaster. I’ve sold over 1000 copies of my self-published book THE SOUND OF SETTLING, which has gotten rave reviews from my readers who want a sequel and a streaming series. Yet I’m still struggling to get that elusive book deal I’ve been chasing for years.
I agree it’s harder than ever to get an agent, which is frustrating considering all of the places on the Internet where we can showcase & promote our work. I query agents every week. I’ve never gotten anything other than an obviously AI generated rejection. I don’t know how else to prove I have a commercial hit to agents/producers looking for new stories from new writers, other than to continue to promote it every single day here on Substack and all across my social media accounts.
The times I was fortunate enough to meet you, you were so warm and generous with your advice, and it’s gratifying to see you still mentoring emerging women writers while always putting out books that are stories that you want to tell
And all of this makes me want to reread Good In Bed for the 100th time ❤️👠
"Erica Jong was the Helen Fielding of Emily Henrys." I love this. I loved this whole essay in fact. Thank you. Please keep writing because for me, your essays are as vital as strength-training for surviving these next four years.
I loved this line so much, and also had to re-read it to untangle its message. I love writing that stops me in my tracks.
I loved everything about this essay. I’ve read all the “chick lit” writers mentioned and enjoyed them all. This was the first time I’ve seen anyone ask why the male writers aren’t separated out and categorized for excoriation in the same way. Women buy and read more fiction than men…and somehow that still works against writers of women-centric fiction? Screw the patriarchy! Read what you love. Write what you love. Thank you for writing this.
First thought: I loved watching S&TC even while I thought Carrie and Samantha and Charlotte and even Miranda were shallow. Even at the time I knew it was a guilty pleasure. Second thought: Paul Theroux -- what a putz. And, the most important thought: critics don't put the best books in our hands. IN HER SHOES was your first book that I read, without having heard your name before. I bought at my favorite tiny indie bookstore decades ago. I took it right home, started reading, and couldn't put it down. And as the plain (but smart!) school-newspaper-editor sib with a gorgeous homecoming-princess sister, that book spoke to me on all different levels. I still love it and it holds up through many rereads. The critics and Paul Theroux don't matter to me. (Pudenda? You KNOW this is not a man who likes women.) It does make me sad when younger female critics feel good about taking potshots and think they have some insider knowledge of what's relevant.
P.S. I am thoroughly enjoying your Substack writing.
Terrific newsletter. Happy to see you here instead of NYT, which I temporarily dropped during their abysmal treatment of Biden.
I want to thank you for always championing women's fiction. That whole "chick lit" labeling thing is almost as annoying as when something is or isn't dubbed "literature". I'm reminded of the Oscar snubs Spielberg endured, because his movies were too popular and accessible. A threat to the effete snobbery.
I'm not your normal demographic; I never see men in the pix from your book signings. I don't know why. Listening to your novels in the car has literally saved my life, keeping me awake and fully engaged during long late-night commutes. So... thanks for that! <3
I once went to an expensive screenwriting conference in Santa Fe, NM.
Its tagline: You could meet someone who will change your life!
Well, no one wanted my scripts about a married couple who switched bodies or Leonardo da Vinci.
But I did meet my husband. So, I like to think I got my money's worth.
Hard agree!
From “Good in Bed” to “The Breakaway”…you still are one of my favorites. Chick lit or women’s fiction, who cares as long as it entertains, teaches a little something and makes me happy. ♥️
Just wrote a sentence in an essay referring to myself as "longing to be a sophisticated and zipless type of woman" and wondered would anyone in 2025 understand what I was talking about???
I’m reading Mrs Everything right now and am trying to picture Joe pole dancing, lol.
First, I loved this piece.
Second, I guess I committed the terrible mistake of quitting my job... and on top of that, I'm stubborn as hell and determined to make this work.
It took me 20+ years to reach a nice position and be more or less recognized by my peers (maybe if they had been a little bit more like me or willing to accept all my weirdness, I would have stayed... who knows), to feel empowered enough to be able to say out loud I deserved something bigger and better. So, here I am, one year after. I have no salary, I've spent many hours in front of my laptop, I've invested in my job by paying a professional to edit my manuscript, and if things go as the contract said... I'll be publishing next year. Yeah, me!
Good for you! Please share when the book comes out!
LOVE this post. I’ve been a fan of yours since the very beginning, when Good in Bed was just out and hadn’t become the massive hit it became. This post is spot on. I’m so sick of the hate on women’s writing and the constant attempts to trash it. Also, I watched SATC shortly after it ended on hbo and adored it back then and watched it over and over again. Fast forward several years and I’ve recently rewatched it and so much of it is just horrifying. But I still have a soft spot in my heart for the show. Have you been watching And Just Like That? It’s so ridiculous but also entertaining.
(Apologies for the long comment!) Before I read one of your books, I saw the movie version of In Her Shoes and fell in love. I picked up Certain Girls, and bonded immediately with Cannie, who looked like me and made me feel brave. From there, I’ve read my way through your literary journey and have never been disappointed. I prefer women’s fiction over chick lit, but I simply call your books great fiction, and recently recommended The Breakaway to my husband, who I know will thoroughly enjoy it. I’ve been a reader since able, a writer since I was an early teen, a journalist for more than 30 years, and a tragically inspired novelist with no gumption to pursue a full-time gig with it (because I suck—it’s OK, I know it). I’m also enjoying my nonfiction writing here more. (Hold on, I’m getting there…) You conjure up thoughts about how my view on writing has changed since I penned my first short story in the early days. For most of my adulthood, I wanted to quit my job and write novels, and when I was between jobs, I had the time, but the words didn’t come. But now, at 56 (which doesn’t feel nearly as old as I thought my grandma and mom were at this age), I realize that I don’t want to write for a living—I wouldn’t quit my full-job job if you gave me a book deal and seven-figure advance. I just want to write without restrictions or prescriptions, and share that with others. Again, apologies for the length of this comment, but thank you for the few minutes of self-reflection this morning. (Also, I desperately need a character like Cannie who’s menopausal but not feeble and one step from the grave, as this age is depicted in too many books. Please consider. 🙂)
I would recommend the Books by the Bay series by Ellery Adams for an older female badass main character!
Thank you! I’ll put the series on my TBR!
Oh, and the purpose of starting this comment in the first place—I LOVED Family, Family.
I'm 70, reasonably educated, and a "retired" nurse (I quit my last job in my mid fifties and didn't seek another). I'm of a liberal bent, opinionated, prone to flights of fancy, obsessed with the "why" in life when it comes to human behavior and it's varied consequences, and to suddenly dropping one passion for a brief depression and then picking up another.
I began to write at around six years of age. My parents, and later I myself kept all of my scribblings in a pile well into my child raising years. As was my tendency, in a brief fit of self-disgust, pessimism and a recurring, but rare desire for organization, put them in a folder, stowed them somewhere and haven't seen them since.
This was during the period when I was recently married, my first son was a toddler and my husband and I accepted my recently widowed mother's invitation to join her in a move from inner city Chicago to rural Missouri. There she would buy some land near her aged parents and her siblings, build a house and settle into a life she wistfully remembered from her childhood.
What’s the rest of the story? This reads like there’s more, and you’ve got my attention. :)
Can't find a way to edit it. I'm as new to blogging as I am to technology.
No worries! (To edit: Click the three dots at the right bottom of your post.) 🙂
Excellent piece, from the perspective on labels to advice re developmental editors (best money I ever spent). Thanks!
I just read last night your article in slate from 2013 about writing likable characters as recommended in my writing class. Seems like in 2025 not a whole lot has changed in the field of women’s fiction. Keep up the great essays!
I was a teenager in the 2000s and chick lit was crucial to my development and understanding of the world - that there was *insert Disney song* more to life then my suburban immigrant path and here's a template for how to live to the life the women you knew didn't know since communism and immigration. Does that exist nowadays?
I loved Fear of Flying for what Erica Jong wrote about writing; the zipless fuck was just an extra. (I'm 83 now.)
And I'm so grateful to have found Jennifer Weiner. I just sent Then Came You to my best friend from fourth grade.
Men have bullied women throughout the ages whenever we display a talent they also possess, because how dare we encroach on their territory. Men critiquing the female sexual experience have about the same amount of expertise about the female sexual experience as the men making laws to control women’s bodies 🙄
SATC is now a cultural touchstone. We can look back and see how we have and haven’t evolved as a society & a species since then
As a writer, my own process has been a roller coaster. I’ve sold over 1000 copies of my self-published book THE SOUND OF SETTLING, which has gotten rave reviews from my readers who want a sequel and a streaming series. Yet I’m still struggling to get that elusive book deal I’ve been chasing for years.
I agree it’s harder than ever to get an agent, which is frustrating considering all of the places on the Internet where we can showcase & promote our work. I query agents every week. I’ve never gotten anything other than an obviously AI generated rejection. I don’t know how else to prove I have a commercial hit to agents/producers looking for new stories from new writers, other than to continue to promote it every single day here on Substack and all across my social media accounts.
The times I was fortunate enough to meet you, you were so warm and generous with your advice, and it’s gratifying to see you still mentoring emerging women writers while always putting out books that are stories that you want to tell
And all of this makes me want to reread Good In Bed for the 100th time ❤️👠
How can we get your book?
Thank you for asking! It’s available at taradublinrocks.com