22 Comments

Kamala's loss and the situation around it hit too close to home for me. I am, just like her, a biracial woman and all of the B.S. that played out on the national stage was a repeat of my own personal life in many ways. I too have been passed over for white mediocre, and racist, men. For all black women it was a slap in the face. A lot of us are sitting this one out. There will be no protests, organizing, etc. Because here we are, at the dumpster fire despite all our efforts to avoid it.

That being said, I also love Thanksgiving. I am in charge of making the turkey, dressing, gravy, and mash potatoes. Love the carbs! It is the best meal I have the entire year. I will be very thankful for the large plate of food and leftovers. It goes along well with the stress eating after a sucky presidential election.

Expand full comment

Laughing at your daughter being catfished by a pumpkin 😊. I am swinging wildly between panic and outrage and an ostrich with its head in the sand. However, I recently read something about trying to act locally against the horrible things happening. I am fortunate to live in the metro DC area, which is pretty solidly blue. But I am going to start attending school board meetings to make sure my daughters will continue to get a real education. I am also looking into how to support the local library system against book banning. Local seems like something I can manage. And of course I’ll keep voting and donating when I can. I am also trying even harder than usual to be kind. I am naturally kind, quick to hold a door etc. but I am going out of my way to let two cars in, or rush up to get the door for someone. Being kind is another easy way to make a positive change in the world.

Expand full comment

I am doing better but still feeling pretty fragile. Suspended my NYT subscription for 10 days but starting to dip back in. To help I read essays from people like you and Bess Kalb!

Expand full comment

Hi Jennifer. Thanks for this post. In my latest post (My Substack is Name Three Things) I expressed similar sentiments. I think it's important to live and enjoy life while observing the current and coming shitshow with some emotional detachment, if only for our collective mental health. But yes, not everyone has the privilege of even a little bit of distance from the threats we face, and in no way am I advocating for giving up or accepting a dictatorship. One organization I support now is The Brigid Alliance, which helps people get safe abortion care. Good luck with your race and I hope your family has a happy Thanksgiving.

Expand full comment

Have you heard of the Truro Community Kitchen? They make and deliver about 120 meals every week. The cooking crew does the prep and meal preparation, the delivery crew delivers the meals and offers some social time. They also pick up last week’s containers and bring them to the Truro Elementary School cafeteria where the green team runs them through the dishwasher. They are cooking 16 turkeys this week. I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving, Jennifer!

Expand full comment

Very enjoyable read and tasty too. Have a great Thanksgiving kiddo.

Expand full comment

Get off your media device? Go walk in the woods, maybe. Really, if there is something us non-influencers, nobodies, just plain citizens can do is to narrow your focus and cut out all the rest of the noise. Maybe keep up with a particular issue and write your Senator and Reps. If you live in a small town, then maybe you could focus on social issues with the police or civic leaders.

Expand full comment

The line about the pumpkin just made my day! And it was a long day, grappling with problems in education and battling antisemitism, so thank you. Happy Thanksgiving.

Expand full comment

Have a tasty Thanksgiving Dre V. And thank you for your response.

Expand full comment

I am so exhausted and am struggling with this week. As a Chicana I already struggle with Thanksgiving and its colonialism/revisionists romanticized history. Also, I don’t like turkey and all the fixings so… add in fascism and the crumbling down of democracy. I’m tired.

But. I’m finding room for hope and for work. It has been announced that 2025 will be the last year of the AIDS LifeCycle, a fundraising bike ride from San Francisco to Los Angeles (approx 545 miles). This ride has been happening for over 30 years and I’ve been involved for the last 10 years. So… instead of living in my bed, hiding and crying (even though that’s what I want to do), I’m focusing on fundraising. My goal is $10k for this year— which is almost double the amount of my highest fundraising years in the past. To help raise money, I opened an Etsy store and am selling handmade jewelry in addition to talking about ALC every single moment I can. Those at highest risk of HIV? Trans women, black men who have sex with men (msm) and Latinx msm. Who are going to be prime targets IMMEDIATELY with this next administration. Yep, trans people, black msm and Latinx msm. The money I raise now and over the next 7 months matters. My contribution matters. And that’s what I need to keep reminding myself over the next 4+ years—- I matter. My work matters.

Expand full comment

Thanks, Joanne Davis. Have a very Happy and tasty Thanksgiving too.

Expand full comment

You win! You are my favorite Substack and writer! Please keep these posts coming. Your ability to tap into what women may be feeling is a gift. And, now I’m going to bake that cornbread cake on Thanksgiving. To keep sane, I will continue to donate to the human resource center in my community. Help my parents navigate their health issues and everyday life. Donate to planned parenthood. And, I am paid subscriber at Hopium Chronicles. Happy Thanksgiving to you and your readers! 🦃🍁😊

Expand full comment

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on all this. I think it is the only path forward. I remind myself that there have always been terrible governments throughout human history and people have carried on with hope throughout all of it.

My favorite running song is Pink’s Just Like Fire. You can’t slow down when that song is playing!

Expand full comment

Every time I drop my son off at work, I’ll drive the few blocks to the ocean. Once I’m there, I get out and walk down to the water where I proceed to scream until I no longer have any voice left. I’ve been doing this twice a week since November 6 and highly recommend it. Very therapeutic & no one is around this time of year.

As for songs, lately “Ghosts” by Springsteen and “Modern Girl” by the Bleachers get me singing along and happy. I watched “Thelma & Louise” again recently & “Part of Me, Part of You” by Glenn Frey always gets me ready to kick misogyny in the ‘nads. I also am loving a ton of old cheesy 80’s hits on the more obscure side (think Starship’s “Find Your Way Back”). I’ll refrain from listing those though because the point is to run away from cars & not directly at them. Plus one has a rhythm that’s reminiscent of the slapping of orthopedic slides. The election results were bad enough & don’t need to go further down that dark road of percussive penance.

May you and yours have a wonderful Thanksgiving filled with perfectly prooortioned pumpkins & memories to cherish.for a lifetime.

Expand full comment

Shark Heart -- best book I read all year. With such an absurd-sounding concept, it was incredibly moving and real. Please share your thoughts when you've finished reading it!

Expand full comment

Love your thoughts and your daughter's humor! I feel like I've been trying to climb out of hole of despair ever since the election. Not feeling the energy to pull up my bootstraps and fight on. And there's always good that coexists - family, carbs, the blue sky, etc.. Meditation and exercise keep me sane as does connecting with likeminded women. Thank you.

Expand full comment