31 Comments

What a wonderful article, Jen, and full of concrete example that I can apply to my own writing. I am certainly guilty of more telling than showing more times than I'd like to admit. I will be watching like a hawk for your next piece! :)

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Annabelle Tometich's memoir "The Mango Tree" has such good writing about a child witnessing a parents' fight -- I felt trapped reading it

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author

That's what the best writing does...it puts you right in the moment (whether you want to be there or not!) I'll look for that book.

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May 1Liked by Jennifer Weiner

Reading this comparison between telling and showing will make me pay more attention to the difference when I'm reading books from different authors.

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May 2Liked by Jennifer Weiner

Philly boy here. Great to see you on Substack!

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May 2Liked by Jennifer Weiner

This was an amazing lesson for writers (and for readers).

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author

Thanks!

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May 2Liked by Jennifer Weiner

This is so helpful, Jen! Thanks for doing this

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author

It was actually a lot of fun. I've been doing some editing for friends and family and I really enjoy it.

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This is so helpful! I have a question and that is can there be too much showing? What is a sign that the writing is getting bogged down in the details? I love how these details add such a richness to the writing but am worried that I won't know when to stop.

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Yaaass! A thousand times yaass!

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May 2Liked by Jennifer Weiner

You seem to assume that she wrote the piece herself. Any proof?

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author

No, I'm pretty sure several ghostwriters had their hands in this (and like I said, she's an incredible singer/dancer/performer...expecting her to be a great writer feels unrealistic).

And I do think that the pros should have pushed for more details.

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I agree with you Jennifer. Whoever ghostwritten her book did not do a great job! They should have known better. Thank you for a wonderful lesson. It made me understand what show instead of telling means in writing.

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It's been confirmed at least 3 different ghosts were attached to this project at different times.

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Ah, the classic high school Language Arts teacher’s lesson. I’ve taught it many times, but my own writing suffers from my training as a social scientist. Great examples!

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I love this analysis! Thanks for sharing such an in-depth example of how writers might do more showing. When I read this book, I definitely got the impression that things were shared almost reluctantly. Like her ghostwriters had to pry as many details as they could out of her, but she really didn't want to say much - or simply isn't one given to a lot of words. As a ghostwriter myself, I think this would've been a really tough project!

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Such a helpful in-depth analysis! In a future article, I'd love to learn about your writing process (how you plot, develop your ideas, write your first drafts, etc.).

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That description of love from The Time Travelers Wife....gahhhh. To have that much love and to be able to describe it!

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Wonderfully explained! This article helped me understand better the perspective of showing. My previous works I've been so guilty of telling more than showing.

Thanks Jennifer!

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An interesting read. I am not a writer, so I’m amazed how a writer can explain in such detail. I’d write like the Britney examples you used; you’ve help me to understand how writers write!

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Thank you so much for this thoughtful illustration of how to bring a literary sensibility to a piece of popular writing!

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